I have heard so much opinion on this topic that it’s making me crazy. The people that make me most insane are usually young, 20-somethings and childless. I was amazed at a young, bright guidance counselor at a high school damning cell phones and the degenerate technology-obsessed youth who possess them. Ok, ok – so the cell phone is disruptive but wake up Neanderthals everywhere the cell phone is here to stay. I however, find that technology in general enhances parenting. And, as a working mother of a 12 year old, 10 year old and 8 month old quick access to the BlackBerry can help be in multiple spots at one time. Clients can access me as I drive a child to dance class or hockey practice, the nanny always knows where I am, kids can even email me home work questions. And, I am not alone as a plethora of articles from parenting to Business Week would agree. Although, as Amy Dunkin, a fellow working mom attested in her Business Week blog it does require commitment and it can feel like a tether as it means, she writes that "I have the cell phone with me—and turned on—at all times: at my desk, in meetings (on vibrate, of course), on errands and lunch breaks, on the train, even in the ladies’ room. And while sometimes it’s annoying to hear it ring when I’m engrossed in my work, more often than not I’m glad for the call and that I’m there to answer it". 
As for me, I am always glad for the call - and they have come to me in the middle of business meetings, conference rooms, contract negotiations and yes, like Amy, even in the bathroom!
In fact, the cell phone has become so much a part of my life that I can not imagine parenting with out it. And, on weekends the kids are not at home or if I am on a business trip I keep my trusty BlackBerry by my bed. Extreme you might think. Connected I say! Now don’t get me wrong – the tool does not abscond one from one’s parental duties – just the opposite. My kids are expected to email me homework lists when they get in, call to let me know plans with friends and check in whilst on school trips. And I have to admit, that a cell phone in the hands of my very busy, social 12 year old daughter gives me additional piece of mind – there are numerous instances I have been relieved she has had her phone from simple movie nights with her girl friends to trips at an Amusement Park or Shopping Mall. (Although I do NOT believe in dropping my daughter off at the amusement park alone with her friends I have agreed to a compromise which is that I am usually the parent on site. She can then "hang out with friends" with out me breathing down her neck for an hour on her own, with her friends but she MUST check in every 45 minutes to let me know where she is via cell phone and coordinate meeting times throughout the day). In addition, it is important to remember, the pay phone is becoming as extinct as the typewriter, therefore the cell phone has become an essential addition to the safety tool-kit.
As much as I love the “staying in touch feeling” I get from the multitude of mobile devices in my home, admittedly a cell phone in the hand so a 12 year old (soon to be teen) leads to a new set of parenting guidelines. For example, I insist that I have full access to her call log, she is limited on number of hours per week, and we reinforce that the cell phone is ultimately for safety purposes and contact with parents NOT to enhance her social life. In addition, we do insist that she take responsibility for its care a hard earned lesson she recently experienced as she lost hers on a snowboarding trip. The result is that we did make her wait it out a couple of months for a new one (explaining the budget impact of it all). But taking advantage of the loss to introduce a lesson in fiscal accountability we have had her research deals on eBay.
Safety and rules aside, I was (naively) surprised to observe that the cell phone is the new social status. Don’t even ask me why I was amazed, in an age of brand obsessed kids (Prada, American Eagle, Gucci, Abercrombie, Lulu Lemon) it is only natural that they the cell phones and all of its features and functions is closely monitored by the play-ground set at grade schools every where. Her current hit list includes iPhone (egads!), a Motorola Razor V3; a double flip Samsung u740 or the LG TU720 Shine Pink…..
I, who clings to my phones forever (I just gave up my age-old blackBerry) what can I say . Ten years ago I was advanced as an early adopter now my kids laugh at me as I cling to my old faithful BlackBerry 8703e Although I have to say – I might just be ready for a new one given all the hype surrounding the BlackBerry 9000 series (but I digress!).
Gayemarie’s general rules for kids and cell phones:
1. Use of a cell phone is a privilege not a right.
2. Parents must have access to all call logs, passwords or access codes at all times
3. The phone is not for social calls or long chat sessions
4. All family numbers must be programmed in
5. Children pay for their own ring tones or unnecessary down loads like games
6. The child's cell phone number is not handed to any one with out prior parental consent this includes friends at school, teachers or coaches
7. If the phone is lost it must be replaced with the cheapest available cell phone or the child pays the difference
8. If the phone usage is abused it will be taken away for up to 30 days
Comments